*This is a collaborative post.
Before children come along a relationship is easy, right? You date, you fall in love, and the rest becomes normal. At some stage you get married and then you decide to start a family and the moment you get that positive pregnancy change your world changes. Nine months later and it changes once again, for good. You become parents, and while that is an amazing experience you can sometimes forget that you are still a couple. A couple that has a relationship that needs just as much attention as your children.
No one enters a marriage expecting it to fail, and when you have children you are even more aware of the impact separating can have on them. Relationships take work, and granted sometimes the best option is to call in the family solicitors and deal with an amicable break. But it is also worthwhile to work on the relationship you both can at least say you tried. With that in mind, here are a few hints and tips to keep your relationship alive.
Talking to one another is so important. It can be about anything, but try and talk about other things than just the kids. Talk about your days, what made you laugh or smile. Just have a conversation with one another. Having this communication will spark up all those lovely warm feelings you have for one another. Communication is also important if you are going through some tough times. Talking about your feelings is the only way to resolve things and move forward. Keep that line of conversation open at all times, for the good and the bad. Your relationship will only grow from it.
No one has it worse
When you become parents to kids, it’s difficult not to feel envious of your partner from time to time. You may think they get the better end of the deal. The chances are they are thinking the same as you. Each of you has your role to play, and try and remember that no one has it worse off. Be sympathetic to one another and try and imagine life in one another’s shoes. You will learn to appreciate each other so much more.
Remember the important dates
Without fail, don’t forget those important dates like birthdays or anniversaries. This is the perfect time to show your partner you care. It’s easy to get wrapped up in your routine of daily life but at least for those days, you remember to acknowledge your partner. The same for the women to. It doesn’t have to be extravagant or expensive, just show that you have thought about them that day. It goes a long way.
Find the time to be a couple as well as mum and dad
Relationships need work no matter how good you think yours is. So invest some time into it as and when you can. It’s nice to have an evening off from playing mum and dad and just to be a couple once again. Date nights are a great way to do this and can rekindle the romance in your relationship.
Work with each other and not against
Finally, work with one another and not against. Parenting is a team sport, and you need to be in it together. It will make life much easier when you have support from one another.
Let’s hope this helps you keep your relationship alive.