It has been a long time since I wrote something personal. The world pandemic has taken over our lives and changed them into something barely recognisable to what they once were. It’s not that I have had nothing to say but once again there seems to have been a sort of block that stopped my fingers reaching for the keys as they would.
I expect part of me has been reluctant to write the unnecessary because it is rare that I ever have a moment alone anymore and I find it hard to do my usual word vomit when the washing machine is beeping, the pot on the stove is boiling, Alyssa is asking me for another snack and Mr Tutu is listening to the next show on his list about cars or computers.
I am not going to lie, I don’t like the new normal. It’s hard and it’s not at all comforting like the previous one was. I used to wake up and whether it was sunny or not, felt that my life wrapped me in warmth because of the happiness and contentment I felt at having found the place in my life where I absolutely wanted to be.
Don’t get me wrong, I still have the most important things in my life but with the lockdown and unable to see family and get the hugs that I, as a hugger, have always needed is hard. A Whatsapp message is not the same of feeling those comforting arms around you.
Mr Tutu is an excellent hugger and has them well timed whenever I am feeling fed-up about the situation we all find ourselves living in. However, there are different kinds of hugs from different people and I miss them all… so much.
I do not necessarily want the world to revert back to how it was before. I am not blind to the fact that changes need to be made; we need to look after our environment and each other A LOT more, the country needs to sort out it’s political state and we need to find a different way to all move forward.
But I long for the day when my daughter isn’t crying because she wants to go to school because she misses her friends and being an only child has little to no interaction with anyone her age during lockdown. I miss walks around my village where people don’t cross the road so they don’t have to pass you. I miss the freedom of being able to go and collect shopping without the worry of being stopped by police for unnecessary travel or even worse, catching this earth shattering virus.
What started out as something we would only have to put up with for a few weeks has now over taken our lives for almost a year. It has become our new normal. I am sure I am not alone in how I feel at the moment and so this post came out as a way to kind of let you know, that you’re not alone either.
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