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11th December 2018
Don’t Forget The Wildlife This Winter
14th December 2018
It’s the end of the day and I have just sat down. Our day began somewhere between 5am and 7 am and depending on the day of the week, we’ve been on the go pretty much the whole day with nursery, work, meal times, social engagements, mundane tasks like shopping and housework and we’re all exhausted.It’s usually around about 8.30pm when I have finally eaten and sat down and unless I have some work to finish off, have a moment to myself and it’s at this point I go through what happened during the day and start to wonder, did I do enough?

Physically yes, I did more than enough running round, backwards and forwards and Alyssa and I will have had cuddles and moments together, but in our everyday life am I taking enough time to actually make memories with her? In 9 months-time she will be starting school and with that deadline looming it’s making me worry I have wasted the 3.5 precious years I have had her at home.

It has gone so fast… I feel like I have blinked and my tiny 5lb baby is a fierce independent, thinks she’s a teenager, little pre-schooler. We, or at least I, will find myself at the end of a day and I’ll think to myself, “oh well, there is always tomorrow,” but the tomorrow’s run out faster than you think.

It made me think whether I am not only making enough memories for my daughter but also for myself. I may only be in my early thirties, but I am youngish and technically single, so whilst I am a mother I also need to make sure I take the time for me and make memories of Katie as a person and not just as a mother.

I had a light bulb moment whilst writing this and remembered that when Alyssa was 4 months old and alyssa wearing a sunhat with her eyes closed enjoying a strawberry as the juice drips down her chinmy blog first begun, I wrote a “Mummy and Alyssa’s Before School Bucket List” and it was a list of 101 things I wanted to do with my daughter before she started school. It ranged from go on a train to make sandcastles on the beach to take a trip to Disneyland – some very achievable and some less so.

Honestly, I was reluctant to click over and read because I was pretty sure I’d feel ashamed of the number we’d actually achieved. I began working my way down the list and by the thirties, a smile had begun to spread across my face as I began to realise how much we had seen and done together. In fact, out of 101 things I said I’d like to do with Alyssa before she started school, there were less than 20 we hadn’t done, meaning there were over 80 memories of special things we’d done together.

alyssa wearing sunglasses and sitting in the chair

As parents, we give ourselves such a hard time over working, staying at home, disciplining, parenting techniques, wanting a little bit of a life away from parenting… you name it and there is a parent out there who feels guilty or worries about it. Yes, we should definitely be taking time out to make memories, be it for ourselves, our children or both, but it doesn’t have to be much. A memory can be made in 5 seconds, let alone 5 minutes or hours.

The important thing is to make them.

*This is a collaborative post.

9 Comments

  1. love these posts. I stopped working 15months ago and like you worried that we weren’t doing enough. Your posts also showed me that we have done a lot. #ABloggingGoodTime

  2. Berni says:

    If you are raising a happy child then, yes, you are doing enough. Lovely post . Happy new year #ablogginggoodtime

  3. Very into being mindful when I think like this. The more value I take in a task as I’m doing it the better I feel at the end of the day I think. #ablogginggoodtime

  4. I’m on the other end of parenting with more of my kids out the door than in the house, and I still ask myself the “enough” questions from time to time, but I always come back to the fact that relationships are living things and there is always the opportunity to pour life into them, even if the life that needs pouring at the moment is the word “sorry.”

  5. I think that this is something that we all struggle with sometimes – and need to give each other a break. My daughter is 7 and I’ve found that some of her happiest times, the moments that mean the most to her, are often the simplest. I also think that taking care of ourselves and taking time to do things that we enjoy is more important than many people realize #blogginggoodtime

  6. So true! Time flies by so quickly and they grow up so fast. That’s why I always try my best to live in the moment with them. ? #ablogginggoodtime

  7. I totally get where you are coming from, even with my eldest being 14 I am constantly wondering if I have done enough, taught her enough, given her enough time, opportunities and experiences. It always feels like we are on a deadline and in 4 years she is considered an adult!!!!!! But I love what you say, we have done more than we realise, and if we make a list of the things we have done it shows what wonderful experiences we truly have been having and memories that will always be cherished. We are too hard on ourselves, as long as they feel loved and secure then nothing is more important. Beautiful post!

  8. Tim says:

    When we set ambitious goals like this it’s important to give ourselves a little leeway. If you’ve done over 80% of what you set out to do that seems pretty reasonable to me – and it’s not worth beating yourself up over the rest. None of us is perfect – and if you’d achieved 100% of your goals you could argue that maybe you didn’t stretch yourself enough. What matters is that we do *something*, not that we do everything. #ablogginggoodtime

  9. I had these very thoughts over the past winter break the girls are having. Memories, good ones, are so important to me, and I want them to be chock full of them, with accompanying stories, giggles, and direct quotes! That’s not too much to ask for! #ablogginggoodtime xoxo

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